As I'm always interested in seeing who's reading what I'm reading, I checked out your journal & userinfo. I am Jewish. I've never heard of the prayer you quoted, but it's beautifully expressed. Just one correction: when you are speaking about G-d, it is appropriate to capitalize the "h" in "He." (Of course, G-d doesn't really have a gender anyway, but that's a whole different discussion.)

Also, I love how you quoted Anne Frank. There's a community on lj called anne_frank, but it's not very active.