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quirkysmuseFandom: Harry Potter
Title: Ginger Snaps
Genre: General/Humor
Characters: McGonagall, Umbridge, Harry, Ron, and Hermione, mentions of Peeves
Rating: G
Word Count: 1312
Notes/Spoilers: Takes place during OotP. I don't know if McGonagall actually LIKES ginger snaps. I just picked something that I thought she'd like. :-)
Summary: “I was informed that Professor Umbridge has been unexpectedly detained for this class period,” she quipped, receiving a few raised eyebrows from the students. McGonagall had to resist a smile when she saw Ron’s relief and Harry’s malicious grin. “So unfortunately, you have to put up with me for the time being.”
Ginger Snaps
As Minerva McGonagall entered the classroom that held Defense Against the Dark Arts, she immediately noticed the thick somber atmosphere. She pursed her lips and frowned as she surveyed the students. They looked positively dismal, and the looks on their faces were mixtures of scowls and grimaces of fear.
Sighing, McGonagall lifted up her wand and raised the shades of the windows. The students perked up to the noise and light, and watched her as she made her way to the head desk.
“Okay, students, I’m your substitute teacher for the day. I suggest you get out your books and start reading the last chapter you were assigned.”
“Professor McGonagall? Where is Professor Umbridge?” Hermione raised her hand and asked right away.
With a twitch of her lip, Harry and Ron could have sworn they saw a ghost of a smirk, and then she regained her usual strait-laced demeanor.
“I was informed that Professor Umbridge has been unexpectedly detained for this class period,” she quipped, receiving a few raised eyebrows from the students. McGonagall had to resist a smile when she saw Ron’s relief and Harry’s malicious grin. “So unfortunately, you have to put up with me for the time being.”
None of the students seemed to mind this, and many of them actually straightened their backs and directed their jubilant and grateful attention to her.
“Now, if someone can tell you where you left off, I maybe can teach you, with my own style of course, on a few defensive spells of my own.”
“Professor,” Hermione chimed in, but she looked rather sheepish. “Professor Umbridge doesn’t allow us to use our wands during class. Her teaching methods are – strictly read-only.”
Everyone stared as McGonagall appeared placid, though if they only knew that she was boiling inside to hear this, and she wanted to add a few more choice words and tortures (in her mind) that she thought Umbridge should endure for such horrible teaching.
Briefly, she rolled her eyes and then sighed. “Well, I’m not one to go around critiquing the teaching methods of my colleagues, no matter how ridiculous and asinine they are. However, since I am your substitute today, maybe we can practice just a few Protego spells just to see how powerful and effective everyone’s is. Now –“
“MCGONAGALL!!!!” The students in the classroom jumped as a large, high piercing squeak that would deafen a banshee slashed through their ears and echoed throughout the classroom. The door slammed open, and then Umbridge stood there, so livid that she was wheezing. The students stared wide-eyed to her entrance, and Harry noticed that her frilly pink suit was disheveled, and littered with mysterious green goop and torn with mangled frilly lace around her collar. She glared daggers at McGonagall, who was very calm and swimming in silent satisfaction.
“Ah, Professor Umbridge, it appears you are well enough to teach class. Excellent, since I was under the impression you would be occupied for quite some time.” She pursed her lips and smiled sweetly, dying for Umbridge’s reaction.
Umbridge charged at her on a broken heel. Her hair seemed to get wilder as she swiftly moved down the aisle, and her eyes began to bulge maniacally on her pudgy face. She pointed a stubby finger at her McGonagall.
“YOU! You and the Headmaster MUST do something about that horrible, ill-mannered poltergeist that just floats around willy-nilly and terrorizes innocent teachers and students! I shall report to the ministry on how lightly you treat this matter. I can only assume you do NOT CARE that – that – insufferable thing tortures the residents at Hogwarts, and thus out of laziness have done nothing about it for several years!”
McGonagall cocked her head and pursed her lips. She made a sound of exasperation, and the students began to watch intently as the scene turned into another row between the two professors, both who mutually despised each other, but could not SHOW such things in front of the students. Although, odds were a majority of students would support McGonagall in a heartbeat.
“Now, Professor Umbridge, we are aware of Peeves’s behavior, and we have dealt with him accordingly over the years and have had no other problems. We feel Peeves has behavioral problems, yes, but he’s more than manageable for the average professor, Hogwarts apparition and even student. His current rise in behavioral delinquencies have become more prominent this year, for some reason,” she paused, and then added lightly. “I only wonder if he’s just not happy, maybe with the new infractions and changes at the school, and is taking his frustration out on random people. It is unfortunate that you have gotten caught up in the cross-fire.” She gave her a wry smile, which caused Umbridge to straighten her back and puff out her face in offense. “I will speak to the Bloody Baron about handling him more sternly. Is that acceptable to you?”
“You do that,” Umbridge gritted through her teeth. “And we’ll see if that is enough. Otherwise, I might have to have some people from the ministry to come here and exorcise the rascal once and for all.” Umbridge gave her a slimy grin; McGonagall stared hard at her. For a few minutes of silence, the two women glared at each other, each one individually stewing with repressed emotions of rage and vengeance.
Soon, McGonagall got tired of the game, and she looked up at the clock. “Oh, it appears that class is almost over, Professor. I shall have to leave you now, since I am due back for my own class in five minutes. Good day then.”
And as she floated toward the door, she shot Harry a sly smile and then lifted her head up in the air as she left. For one day, she had delayed, if not robbed Umbridge of at least one class of horrible teaching and abuse on the students. With that, McGonagall had felt it was a worthy triumph.
Umbridge limped to her desk with a scowl. McGonagall had usurped her position today and stolen her class time away from her. She plopped in her chair in a huff, and the students stared at her with an air of smarminess. She glared at them; there was only two minutes left of class and not nearly enough time to find some reason to punish them.
~*~
The atmosphere of everybody after they left class was cheery, erasing the usual melancholy and rage that Umbridge instilled in people.
“Say, Hermione,” Harry turned to her as they walked down to their next class. “Do you know if Professor McGonagall has a favorite food?”
Hermione raised an eyebrow at him, but she couldn’t help grin knowingly to his intention. Ron smiled calculatingly beside him. “Sure. I overheard her telling Professor Sprout one day that she just couldn’t get enough of ginger snaps lately, especially now since she so stressed out with Umbridge around.”
“Make sense,” Ron said, rubbing his chin. “I know when I’m depressed I like to have a few chocolate frogs here and there.”
Harry laughed and poked him in the stomach. “Ron, you sound like Lupin. Anyway, thanks, Hermione.” The two of them looked at Harry and knew he was up to something. He grinned and had a far away look on his face. “I think I might just have an idea.”
~*~
Later that afternoon after all classes were over, McGonagall stepped back into her office after a meeting with Dumbledore. On her desk there was a small bag tied with a ribbon and a note.
She untied the ribbon and looked inside, and smiled as she got a whiff of ginger. She opened the envelope and read the message.
“Dear Professor,
Thanks for today.
Your Housemates.”
McGonagall smirked, picked up a ginger snap, and tasted the tangy sweetness of the day’s victory.
THE END
Title: Ginger Snaps
Genre: General/Humor
Characters: McGonagall, Umbridge, Harry, Ron, and Hermione, mentions of Peeves
Rating: G
Word Count: 1312
Notes/Spoilers: Takes place during OotP. I don't know if McGonagall actually LIKES ginger snaps. I just picked something that I thought she'd like. :-)
Summary: “I was informed that Professor Umbridge has been unexpectedly detained for this class period,” she quipped, receiving a few raised eyebrows from the students. McGonagall had to resist a smile when she saw Ron’s relief and Harry’s malicious grin. “So unfortunately, you have to put up with me for the time being.”
Ginger Snaps
As Minerva McGonagall entered the classroom that held Defense Against the Dark Arts, she immediately noticed the thick somber atmosphere. She pursed her lips and frowned as she surveyed the students. They looked positively dismal, and the looks on their faces were mixtures of scowls and grimaces of fear.
Sighing, McGonagall lifted up her wand and raised the shades of the windows. The students perked up to the noise and light, and watched her as she made her way to the head desk.
“Okay, students, I’m your substitute teacher for the day. I suggest you get out your books and start reading the last chapter you were assigned.”
“Professor McGonagall? Where is Professor Umbridge?” Hermione raised her hand and asked right away.
With a twitch of her lip, Harry and Ron could have sworn they saw a ghost of a smirk, and then she regained her usual strait-laced demeanor.
“I was informed that Professor Umbridge has been unexpectedly detained for this class period,” she quipped, receiving a few raised eyebrows from the students. McGonagall had to resist a smile when she saw Ron’s relief and Harry’s malicious grin. “So unfortunately, you have to put up with me for the time being.”
None of the students seemed to mind this, and many of them actually straightened their backs and directed their jubilant and grateful attention to her.
“Now, if someone can tell you where you left off, I maybe can teach you, with my own style of course, on a few defensive spells of my own.”
“Professor,” Hermione chimed in, but she looked rather sheepish. “Professor Umbridge doesn’t allow us to use our wands during class. Her teaching methods are – strictly read-only.”
Everyone stared as McGonagall appeared placid, though if they only knew that she was boiling inside to hear this, and she wanted to add a few more choice words and tortures (in her mind) that she thought Umbridge should endure for such horrible teaching.
Briefly, she rolled her eyes and then sighed. “Well, I’m not one to go around critiquing the teaching methods of my colleagues, no matter how ridiculous and asinine they are. However, since I am your substitute today, maybe we can practice just a few Protego spells just to see how powerful and effective everyone’s is. Now –“
“MCGONAGALL!!!!” The students in the classroom jumped as a large, high piercing squeak that would deafen a banshee slashed through their ears and echoed throughout the classroom. The door slammed open, and then Umbridge stood there, so livid that she was wheezing. The students stared wide-eyed to her entrance, and Harry noticed that her frilly pink suit was disheveled, and littered with mysterious green goop and torn with mangled frilly lace around her collar. She glared daggers at McGonagall, who was very calm and swimming in silent satisfaction.
“Ah, Professor Umbridge, it appears you are well enough to teach class. Excellent, since I was under the impression you would be occupied for quite some time.” She pursed her lips and smiled sweetly, dying for Umbridge’s reaction.
Umbridge charged at her on a broken heel. Her hair seemed to get wilder as she swiftly moved down the aisle, and her eyes began to bulge maniacally on her pudgy face. She pointed a stubby finger at her McGonagall.
“YOU! You and the Headmaster MUST do something about that horrible, ill-mannered poltergeist that just floats around willy-nilly and terrorizes innocent teachers and students! I shall report to the ministry on how lightly you treat this matter. I can only assume you do NOT CARE that – that – insufferable thing tortures the residents at Hogwarts, and thus out of laziness have done nothing about it for several years!”
McGonagall cocked her head and pursed her lips. She made a sound of exasperation, and the students began to watch intently as the scene turned into another row between the two professors, both who mutually despised each other, but could not SHOW such things in front of the students. Although, odds were a majority of students would support McGonagall in a heartbeat.
“Now, Professor Umbridge, we are aware of Peeves’s behavior, and we have dealt with him accordingly over the years and have had no other problems. We feel Peeves has behavioral problems, yes, but he’s more than manageable for the average professor, Hogwarts apparition and even student. His current rise in behavioral delinquencies have become more prominent this year, for some reason,” she paused, and then added lightly. “I only wonder if he’s just not happy, maybe with the new infractions and changes at the school, and is taking his frustration out on random people. It is unfortunate that you have gotten caught up in the cross-fire.” She gave her a wry smile, which caused Umbridge to straighten her back and puff out her face in offense. “I will speak to the Bloody Baron about handling him more sternly. Is that acceptable to you?”
“You do that,” Umbridge gritted through her teeth. “And we’ll see if that is enough. Otherwise, I might have to have some people from the ministry to come here and exorcise the rascal once and for all.” Umbridge gave her a slimy grin; McGonagall stared hard at her. For a few minutes of silence, the two women glared at each other, each one individually stewing with repressed emotions of rage and vengeance.
Soon, McGonagall got tired of the game, and she looked up at the clock. “Oh, it appears that class is almost over, Professor. I shall have to leave you now, since I am due back for my own class in five minutes. Good day then.”
And as she floated toward the door, she shot Harry a sly smile and then lifted her head up in the air as she left. For one day, she had delayed, if not robbed Umbridge of at least one class of horrible teaching and abuse on the students. With that, McGonagall had felt it was a worthy triumph.
Umbridge limped to her desk with a scowl. McGonagall had usurped her position today and stolen her class time away from her. She plopped in her chair in a huff, and the students stared at her with an air of smarminess. She glared at them; there was only two minutes left of class and not nearly enough time to find some reason to punish them.
~*~
The atmosphere of everybody after they left class was cheery, erasing the usual melancholy and rage that Umbridge instilled in people.
“Say, Hermione,” Harry turned to her as they walked down to their next class. “Do you know if Professor McGonagall has a favorite food?”
Hermione raised an eyebrow at him, but she couldn’t help grin knowingly to his intention. Ron smiled calculatingly beside him. “Sure. I overheard her telling Professor Sprout one day that she just couldn’t get enough of ginger snaps lately, especially now since she so stressed out with Umbridge around.”
“Make sense,” Ron said, rubbing his chin. “I know when I’m depressed I like to have a few chocolate frogs here and there.”
Harry laughed and poked him in the stomach. “Ron, you sound like Lupin. Anyway, thanks, Hermione.” The two of them looked at Harry and knew he was up to something. He grinned and had a far away look on his face. “I think I might just have an idea.”
~*~
Later that afternoon after all classes were over, McGonagall stepped back into her office after a meeting with Dumbledore. On her desk there was a small bag tied with a ribbon and a note.
She untied the ribbon and looked inside, and smiled as she got a whiff of ginger. She opened the envelope and read the message.
“Dear Professor,
Thanks for today.
Your Housemates.”
McGonagall smirked, picked up a ginger snap, and tasted the tangy sweetness of the day’s victory.
THE END
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on 2006-02-03 07:14 am (UTC)Eleanor
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on 2006-02-03 01:54 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2006-11-11 03:12 am (UTC)