quirkysmuse: (claire-heroes)
quirkysmuse ([personal profile] quirkysmuse) wrote2009-05-07 03:08 pm

Heroes, "Not Enough" Peter/Claire ficlet, rated R

Fandom: Heroes
Title: Not Enough
Author: Paynesgrey
Pairings/Characters: Peter/Claire
Rating: R
Word Count: 468 (with quotes)
Warnings: sexual themes, incest
Genre: Angst/Romance
Notes: Written for the "Safe" prompt at [livejournal.com profile] pairechallenge.

Summary: She won't give him up; he is the only place she wants to exist.



“I don't want to be safe,
I want to go down with you
Together we will find a way to come back”


“Not Enough” – Lacuna Coil


Not Enough

Claire knows safety is always important.

Wear glasses when you operate heavy machinery. Stop, drop, and roll when you’re on fire. Don’t touch a hot stove. Don’t pet a strange dog.

She’s always careful, but all of that pretty much doesn’t apply to her. She can’t get hurt, so safety isn’t a big deal. And touching a hot stove actually feels good on some days.

She snorts as she sits up from the bed. Beside her, Peter snores comfortably. The bottoms of her feet touch the cold floor, and she looks down at him and frowns.

Her body is always safe, but what about her heart? Bruised and damage, it takes a beating in other ways that her bones and flesh cannot.

“I love you, Claire, but we can’t be like this, not ever,” he says to her last night. The fault is hers, however. She falls into his arms weeping, and she knows that if she turns to him, he will never deny her. Peter always provides the comfort she needs. She never means to kiss him, but she’s sure he never intends to kiss her back.

She almost laughs. They even practice safe sex, stopping within their heated tumble to bring out a condom. Peter, ever so prepared and organized, does not even let that sin slip by.

Then, she feels him, hard and warm, and he becomes the only place she ever wants to exist. He moves his hands onto her, over her, leaving a trail of heat down her neck and within her thighs. He consumes her with his mouth, the same mouth that smiles at her when she’s depressed. The same mouth that says the words, “I love you,” over and over again like a song she plays on a repeat.

The dark of night falls over them, and their secret lovemaking is blanketed within a safe haven for now. Soon the piercing light of day comes and they have to pull away.

“This can never happen again,” he whispers to her after a kiss. The kiss feels like a lie, almost. “I’m sorry.”

She cries against his chest and he breaks away and rolls over to fall asleep. At least he stays in bed with her. He could just run away.

But it doesn’t save her from the heartbreak.

He wakes up and she meets his eyes. She buttons up his shirt around her, and she smells their mixed scents. Resolution surges through her, and with an unyielding expression she makes a promise.

“I won’t give up on us,” she says, and within the dread of his dark eyes he knows that she means it.

[identity profile] linsadair.livejournal.com 2009-05-07 09:05 pm (UTC)(link)
So sad. So sweet.

[identity profile] quirkysmuse.livejournal.com 2009-05-07 09:08 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you. :)
(deleted comment)

[identity profile] quirkysmuse.livejournal.com 2009-05-07 09:11 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you so much, chica! XD

[identity profile] warangel88.livejournal.com 2009-05-07 10:18 pm (UTC)(link)
So bittersweet. But good.

[identity profile] quirkysmuse.livejournal.com 2009-05-08 12:07 am (UTC)(link)
Thank you.

[identity profile] lonewonderslove.livejournal.com 2009-05-08 01:38 am (UTC)(link)
Wow, this is beautiful. I love your writing style; it really evokes a lot of emotion. Sweet and heartbreaking at the same time. Great work.

[identity profile] quirkysmuse.livejournal.com 2009-05-08 01:39 pm (UTC)(link)
Wow, thank you very much. I'm so glad you enjoyed it.

[identity profile] jetsabul.livejournal.com 2009-05-08 05:11 am (UTC)(link)
This was amazing, I love it.

[identity profile] quirkysmuse.livejournal.com 2009-05-08 01:39 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you! :)

[identity profile] wuhdemah.livejournal.com 2009-05-08 01:38 pm (UTC)(link)
This was a perfect thing to read right after waking up! It was incredibly heartbreaking and you really feel for Claire here. :(

Great job!

[identity profile] quirkysmuse.livejournal.com 2009-05-08 01:39 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks darlin! I'm glad you enjoyed it.

[identity profile] rtwofan.livejournal.com 2009-05-08 07:42 pm (UTC)(link)
Ooh, interesting and NEW. I still like reading your Paire. You always give it a breath of fresh air =)

[identity profile] quirkysmuse.livejournal.com 2009-05-08 07:52 pm (UTC)(link)
Wow, thanks so much, chica! I'm glad that you think that. It's very encouraging for me to write more. ;P

[identity profile] golden-scarlett.livejournal.com 2009-05-10 01:56 am (UTC)(link)
oh I thought I'd commented on this! I love it. Bittersweet classic Paire...just the way I like it! Great writing as always :)

[identity profile] quirkysmuse.livejournal.com 2009-05-10 11:00 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you so much! I appreciate it.

[identity profile] turkoizdog.livejournal.com 2009-05-10 05:35 am (UTC)(link)
Very sweet, very sad, although the ending made me smile.

Not used to reading fics in present tense, but this just works.

[identity profile] quirkysmuse.livejournal.com 2009-05-10 11:01 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you!

Ah, I've been writing in present tense here and there lately. I find present tense brings more urgency to the piece.
I'm glad you think it works. <3