Castle, "Acceptance" Kate Beckett, Beckett/Castle implied

[quirkysmuse]

Fandom: Castle
Title: Acceptance
Author: Paynesgrey
Characters/Pairings: Becket/Castle, Kate Beckett POV, mention of Det. Demming
Rating: G
Genre: Introspection
Spoilers: Season 2 finale
Word Count: 560
Notes: Written for my A-Z meme, "Ex-Relationship" for psyco_chick32.

Summary: Kate has some thoughts after Castle leaves for the summer.



Kate Beckett rang off a shot, and the noise made a sharp echo in the room. Thankfully her ears were protected. She focused - or at least tried, on her target, and quickly after few subsequent rounds, she had to take a deep breath and remind herself to replace the practice paper she had obliterated with her burst of angry bullets.

When the summer was over, Castle was going to pay. Oh, she was going to get him good. She had spent a substantial amount of time wallowing about how she alone had ruined her summer because of him. She had dissolved a perfectly - well, adequate relationship with Detective Demming to just for once, throw caution to the wind and listen to her heart, and well, now Kate was more than regretting it.

She wondered if she had really listened to her heart or if it had been impulse. More than that, the cheer-leading squad around the department didn't help matters. Of course, she couldn't blame them for all of it. Kate had been denying what was there and what was growing between her and Castle for some time. And now that he was gone, doing what he was meant to do and proving that he could be just fine without her, Kate Beckett had the displeasure of admitting that life just wasn't the same without him.

She lowered her gun and ended shooting practice for the day. Whatever stress she'd been longing to release was still hovering around her, and killing paper wasn't going to solve anything. Neither was imagining Castle's head there or even her own.

Kate snorted to herself, looked down at her watch, and prepared to go home - alone, when it took everything within her power to hold off the fantasy of having fun in the Hampton's with Rick Castle. Reality was much more trying; he'd be having fun alright, but not with Kate and most definitely with another woman. When Kate instinctively longed for Tom's company, she knew she was fooling herself. Whatever had progressed between her and the robbery detective was as good as dead. She sabotaged it herself, and even if she hadn't and they had gone together with some hope of a future, she knew it wouldn't have lasted, not with Rick Castle always in the space of her mind.

Kate Beckett realized the starking truth - even if it was too little, too late. She had feelings for Rick Castle; crazy, frustrating yet tantalizing feelings and one lonely summer wasn't going to scrub those away.

When she arrived at home, a new place she was still getting used to, she put her keys on the table and settled into her lazy mode for the night. Even chocolate ice cream and reruns of Law & Order couldn't heal the sinking feeling, and she knew every night it would plague her. The more she struggled to deny it, the more miserable she became. So, Kate Beckett gave in. It was time to indulge herself. Castle was already on her mind, and he wasn't going anywhere.

She lingered over her to bookshelf, and after opening a door to the bottom cupboard, she ran her finger over the spine of the first Derrick Storm series. She sighed languidly and pursed her lips in defeat. Well, she might as well get this depressing summer started.

Comments

[apckrfan.livejournal.com]

I'm so behind on your recent offerings, and for that I apologize. I had to read this as soon as I saw the tags because no Castle this week made me sad LOL

This was a very good piece, nice and believable delving into the mind of Kate Beckett (love that she watches L&O reruns LOL).

I know so many people who have been busting Castle's chops for what he did at the end of the last episode, and I try to defend him. She hadn't told him she'd broken up with Schlemming *s* and faced with the prospect of 3 months home alone when he's *never* been alone before - well, I can see him making the decision he did. I know after my son died, I would have been sorely tempted to take my ex back if he wasn't otherwise indisposed in jail at the time. Everyone responds to loneliness differently, and Castle isn't an alone kind of guy.

Anyway, nice piece! Glad you had her still liking him and not making him into a monster or a jerk. He'll feel bad enough when he finds out what she was going to tell him that night!

[quirkysmuse.livejournal.com]

I think you touched on Castle's personality exactly. And I would think that even an incident where Castle is being his usual self (Kate declined his offer, so Castle looked elsewhere for company) wouldn't make her lose her feelings for him that quickly.

But I think she'll get him back in her own way. Plus, I think she'd know he will feel bad (like kicking a puppy) when he finds out about her and Demming.

Thanks for reading, chica! :3

[psyco_chick32]

Oh wow this is fabulous! And it makes me angst so much for the next season...

xD I shouted at the TV after Castle, but I have to defend him, too - I'm sure he'll feel bad when he finds out about her and Demming.

A great look at Beckett here - <3 <3 <3

[quirkysmuse.livejournal.com]

Thanks, darlin! ARGH, yes, I'm angsting over it too. Holy crap, I can't wait until next season. D:

[quirkysmuse.livejournal.com]

Thank you! Oh, I'm pretty sure the whole of Castle fandom was raging. Great way to end the season, eh?

[theaquamarine.livejournal.com]

Very nice introspective piece! I love the image of Kate taking her anger out once again with target practice- next thing you know she'll be hitting a punching bag with Castle's face on it! ;) I especially loved the line "More than that, the cheer-leading squad around the department didn't help matters" Wasn't really intended to be funny, but I giggled at the thought of Ryan and Esposito being her little cheerleaders ;) Good work!

[quirkysmuse.livejournal.com]

Thank you! :)